Tuesday, September 25, 2012

I DID IT!!! 50:04

I can't do it I said to Savahna as we are nearing the crowd of people cheering loudly. My body hurt, I couldn't breath or see. Don’t fall, your doing this for a wonderful cause,  don’t fall, stop crying, don’t fall was all that was crossing my mind when I stepped over the finish line.

This is the best worst picture I've ever taken!


Thank you JESUS I DID IT!!!




I did it!!!


I knew going in that I'm not in a movie, I'm not a Disney princess so my mommy and Greg and all of my friends weren’t suddenly going to appear at the finish line. But because they weren’t there it meant so much more.


I did it. ( all GOD)


If you have spent any amount of time with me then you know I have some self image issues. So it's no surprise that the morning of the race up until the last minute I didn't think  I was going to make it. I know some of you are rolling you eyes and saying things like oh you were fine but seriously y'all I still can't believe that happened! I asked my mom if I was dreaming and was going to wake up and have to do it all over again! These past 6 months have not been the best and it just amazes me what the lord can do!


God made me realize the strength I have in Him this weekend. He knew exactly who I needed there and why, ( love you Savahna)


 This weekend brought new meaning to Philippians 4:13 for me!


Saturday, September 22, 2012

Night before my first 5k!

Gosh I've been neglecting my blog. Partially because when I gave my blog a makeover and started on this journey I thought I'd be "smaller, lighter, faster" than I am now, Like the isarah5. Sadly I weigh more than I did then and am not near where I thought I was going to be 6 months ago. But thats okay.  My 5k is in 8 hours and of course I can't sleep and junk, because nerves just plain stink!

When I went into Lukes Locker to pick up my registration packet I was so overwhelmed with emotion. If you know me then you know I'm always emotional so this shouldn't come as much of a surprise .Especially after spending the day on a date with God ( yeah ask me later ) I want nothing more than to complete that 5k tomorrow and keep on going. Is this your first 5k they said? I was like goodness is it that obvious!! It was such an honor to tell those complete strangers why I am choosing this as my first 5k. And I left that store not embarrassed because I'm going to be the only girl in a men's shirt because they didn't have my size but because I've stuck to my word. I'm going to finish that race tomorrow and God is going to use this in a big way. My friend Jenna compared this adventure as a pilgrimage! Can't wait to see what happens :) I'm also super thankful my friend Savahna chose to come do this with me- more on that tomorrow!

7 months ago best friend and someone I truly care about made the decision to enter a year and a half  rehab program. Before he left he encouraged me to make some changes too. So what better way to attmpt a new and healthy life than to honor him with this first run. I miss him tons and wish more than anything that he was here today/tomorrow. We rarely get to talk besides me sending letters but thankfully the Lord knows what I need and I got to talk to him for about 10 mins on friday! Such an encouragement to make a difference while I'm out here in the real world.

September is National recovery month and even though its almost over I encourage you to check it out. My little bag I got says, Prevention works, Treatment is effective, and people recover. Those 3 statements were quite powerful to me.  Because Alcoholism doesn't run in my family and I grew up ( thankfully) sheltered I've had to do lost of research about alcoholism in the past year or so. Recovery is something that we should all be aware of, not just from Drugs and Alcohol but also our sin and junk that crowds our hearts. I've been reading and listening to lots of Podcasts about the heart lately thanks to my new bible-study **shoutout Team Black Hearts** Anyways we are all in some form of recovery.

 So I'm not just running tomorrow for his recovery.
 I'm running for my own. 


Saturday, September 8, 2012

Life like a commercial...

I fell off the blogging wagon.
I should make excuses but I'm going to.
"Why did you fall off the blogging wagon Sarah?"

Depression. (and traffic) I feel like Im in a Cymbalta commercial. " Depression Hurts" "Where does depression hurt?"
Seriously that commercial and the Ambilify one ( with the blue robe) Can explain how I feel way better than me.

This is week three of me on an Anti- Depressant.
I'm allowing the Lord to work through the medicine to help level out my emotions.

I have 15 Days until my 5k.
I am way way way way way WAY behind.

I'm going to do it anyways. I don't care how much it cost or how long it takes me. I will cross the finish line one way or another.

This " Run for Recovery" is my way of saying I love you and I care.
So I will cross the finish line.

I walked about 2 miles yesterday and Thursday! Then got up this morning and walked then did some P 90!
so we are on the right tract.
(I then went to the doughnut shop to surprise my aunt... but thats okay.)

I got this yesterday from a dear friend and just wanted to share.

I ask God: take away my habit. God said no: its not for me to take away, but for you to give up.
I ask God: grant me patience. God said no: patience is a by product of tribulations it is not granted, it is learned.
I ask God: spare me pain. God said no: suffering draws you apart from worldly cares & brings you closer to me.
I ask God: make my spirit grow. God said no: you must grow on your own. But I will prune you to make you fruitful.
I ask God: for all things that I may enjoy life. God said no: I will give you life, so that you may enjoy all things.
I ask God: help me love others as much as You love me. God said "ahhh" finally you have the idea!