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Friday, January 28, 2011

"we are just friends" "yeah so were adam and eve"

ok so in orientation yesterday one of the teachers was making a joke about the 1st year no dating rule and said

"we are just friends" "yeah so were Adam and Eve"

Everyone in the building cracked up but much to my surprise not me..... my eyes suddenly filled with tears and God decided to take me for a loop. Bam right there in the middle of a joke I had a small breakthrough ect.....

Just the night before I was going through some of the things I brought back and ran across "Every Woman's Battle- discovering God's plan for sexual and emotional fulfillment" I put it on the shelf and thought to my self - eh I don't need to read that again I'm not struggling in those areas....


Well God obviously disagreed.

right there in the middle of class and surround by all the 2 semesters -3rd years I had a break down.
suddenly the words "emotionally pure" popped into my head and taunted me for the rest of the day :)

so thank Heavens for Ibooks because I hopped on my handy dandy ipod and searched emotionally pure and bam there was a book recommended by some of my favorite authors...

soooooo I bought it...











After the first chapter I realized I'm in a "emotional relationship" with multiple men. This broke my heart just a little because how can I say I'm ready to be married to one man for the rest of my life when obviously there's other junk going on in my emotions and subconscious.

If you know me or read this blog it will come as no surprise to you that I'm ready to be married. I know God won't keep me single a day longer than planned though :D and that my friends is a new found comfort for me!


SO It looks like God is about to rock my world and my "emotional relationships"


Why am I sharing all this with the blog world? 
some of the people highly disagree with me airing my dirty laundry all over the internet
but
I feel that God is starting to break through and work something huge in my life with this right now and I would like to take y'all on the journey. Also I may need the accountability, and could sure use the prayer.

Proverbs 4:23 says guard your Heart for it is the wellspring of life....


Up until now I honestly thought it had been guarded, slowly I'm realizing maybe I'm not as tough as I think.

3 comments:

  1. I want/need your book recommendations. Love this blog. Putting your 'dirty laundry' out there encourages the people that read this to search within themselves to say, "I've been there. This is what I can do to try and help...," or, "I'm there right now! We are not alone." Beautiful.

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  2. God desires to use the humble. He can't use us if we are full of pride, we don't feel the NEED for the Lord. Being open with what God is doing in your life allows us to bring Him the glory He deserves and desires. Let Him work!! Be wise, have discernment about what you share, but let God have all the glory! It is about Him anyway! :)
    "As each has received a gift, use it to serve one another, as good stewards of God's varied grace: whoever speaks oracles of God; whoever serves, as one who serves the strength that God supplies-in order that in everything God may be glorified through Jesus Christ. To him belong glory and dominion forever and ever. Amen"
    1 Peter 10-11
    Love you Sarah!!

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  3. Those of us with big hearts and extra empathy for others can help but struggle with this area. I love you sweet pea.

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